Winter Family Fun

Winter has arrived and with it many parents are left wondering what to do to keep their little ones entertained. Let's face it, living here in Minnesota winter is long, cold and snowy. It seems that by the time January rolls around everyone is getting a little stir crazy. At the start of winter, I ask parents in all of my classes to share ideas of places to go and things to do, both outside and inside, with their young children. Then I create a master list to share with families. I thought that this year I would share some of the highlights from that list with all of you. 

Indoor Fun

1. Play with Shaving Cream-Spray a small pile of shaving cream on your table or in a larger container. Be sure to use the foam not the gel. Give your child tools like popsicle sticks, spoons or toy cars and let them play! 
2. Dollar Store Bin or Drawer-Keep a bin filled with easy to do craft items/supplies that you can get at the dollar store or dollar section. Let your child pick an activity to do. An alternative to this is have a Dollar Store Day. Take your child to the dollar store or section. Give them a set amount of money, maybe $5 and let them pick out crafts or toys to play with. 
3. Recycled play-keep cardboard boxes, plastic bottles and lids. Combine these things with tape/glue and let your child's imagination soar. 
4. Painter's Tape Fun-Check out this great list of over 40 painters tape games and crafts.
5. Have a Dance Party-Turn on your favorite tunes and dance with your kids. This has the added benefit of be a great workout too!
6. Have an indoor picnic
7. Make Playdough-Give your child a variety of tools, rolling pin, cookie cutters, popsicle sticks, blocks, etc. Playdough is also a great item for kids to practice using safety scissors.  

Outdoor Fun

1. Build Snow Castles-Use different sizes and shapes of containers, buckets or pails and build snow castles instead of sand castles. This can be done indoors as well by bringing a large container of snow inside. 
2. Snow Painting-Add food coloring or washable paint to water in spray or squirt bottles and let your little artist paint the snow. 
3. Go sledding and/or ice skating. For safety be sure to have your child wear a helmet for both of these activities. 
4. Read the book Snowballs by Lois Ehlert. Collect items around your house to help you build a snowman.
5. Visit one of the many Nature Centers in the Twin Cities area.

 Other Fun Ideas

1. Night at the Children's Museum-Join other families from South Washington County Schools Early Learning Program at the Children's Museum on Thursday, January 23rd from 5:30 to 8pm. The cost is $5 per person. Click HERE to register!
2. Check out one of our Drop-In Play Times
3. Pajama Story Time-Join us at our Central Park location on February 5th from 6-7 for a special story time with Washington County Libraries. This is a free event. No registration need. 

I hope that this list gets you started on creating winter family fun with your child. Think about your own childhood. What were some of your favorite winter activities? Share these activities with your child.

Attitude of Gratitude

I recently had a memory pop up on a certain social media site that got me thinking about gratitude. I had had a tough day with my kids and decided to write out one thing I was thankful for about each of my kids from the day. My hope was that by focusing on what I was thankful for at night, I would be able to reset my mindset for the next day.  And here's the thing, it worked. I remember waking up being excited to get on with my day instead of worrying if it was going to be another tough day.

Research supports this practice. People who express gratitude experience higher levels of happiness. According to Harvard Medical School Healthbeat, showing gratitude benefits people by increasing positive emotions, higher levels of enjoyment for good experiences, better at handling adversity, improved health and build stronger relationships.

In parenthood it can be easy to get bogged down by the day to day. Whether it is managing a balance between work and family life, dealing with toddler tantrums, sleep deprivation, making meals that everyone will eat, or coordinating everyone's schedules, parents can become overwhelmed. We can fall into the trap of focusing on all the hard things about being a parent.

With Thanksgiving right around the corner, I thought I would share with you a few of the things that I am grateful for and some ways to incorporate gratitude into your daily life.

• Write a Thank You Note-Thank you notes are a great way to build strong relationships with another person by expressing your gratitude for something they have done for you or their part in your life. Writing thank you notes also increases your happiness. So here's my thank you note to you: Thank you for taking the time to read this blog. I appreciate being able to share my knowledge and hope that what I write has a positive impact on you. 
• Count your blessings-Set aside some time each week to focus on the blessings you have in your life. Write down a list of maybe 3 to 5 things each week that you feel are blessings in your life. Be specific and think about how these blessings make you feel. Check out my three blessings for this past week. 
• My oldest daughter volunteered to stay up late and pick her sister up following a hockey game since I was feeling under the weather. It was so nice to be able to go to bed early. I woke up the next morning feeling so much better. 
• My husband planned date night for us. We enjoyed dinner, dessert and had time to catch up with one another since he was gone for work most of the week. 
• My amazing co-workers who were willing to roll with it when I was out sick one day and wasn't able to find a sub. Knowing that my teaching team would be able to make it work without me there gave me peace of mind. 
• Meditate-Practicing meditation allows you to focus on the present moment. Practice focusing on something you are grateful for. This might be the sun shining through your window or the smell of your morning coffee as you focus on breathing in the aroma. 
• Say thank you-Make sure you say thank you to those around you. Thank the cashier, the server at the restaurant, receptionist at the doctors office. Just saying thank you not only makes you feel better but also the recipient.  

Another benefit to practicing gratitude is that you are modeling it for your child. One of the ways children learn how to be grateful by seeing us be grateful. Take time each day to thank your child for things they do and encourage them to start saying thank you too. 

It's Scary!!

Ghost, Witches and Ghouls, Oh My! This time year can present many opportunities for young children to be exposed to scary things even if your family doesn't participate in the upcoming Halloween holiday.

It doesn't take much. Your child might see a scary decoration during simple trip to the store or a walk around the neighborhood. When my son was younger, about 2 years old, he saw a scary monster statue in the store as we walked past the Halloween section. From that point on, we had to strategically navigate through the store to avoid that area. He would say, "No monsters!" every time we went to the store. So now seems like a good time to take a closer look at childhood fears and how we can help our kids deal with these fears. 

It is normal for young children to develop fears. Even kids as young as 8 months can start to show fearful responses to strangers. Young toddlers recognize fearful responses in their caregivers and will move closer to them. Children, age 2 to 5, can start to develop typical fears, like being afraid of the dark, monsters or animals. It is also important to remember that kids don't start recognizing the difference between fantasy and reality until between ages 3 to 5. 

Parents can help kids navigate their fears in a number of ways: 

1. Sometimes parents are surprised by their child's fear or think the fear is silly. When your child is afraid, reassure them and let them know they are safe no matter what.
2. Label your child's fear. "That dog barked loudly and it scared you."
3. Find ways to empower your child with tools to help them. If your child is afraid of the dark, let them choose if they want to have a lamp left on in the room or the door open with a light left on in the hall. 
4. Prepare your child ahead of time if you know they might encounter something that will scare them. You might talk with your child about kids being dressed in costumes if you are going to a Halloween party.  

Here are somethings to avoid when helping your child navigate their fears. 

1. Try not to laugh at your child's fear, even if you think it is silly. 
2. Don't tell your child not to be afraid or that something isn't scary. It is scary to them even if we don't think it is scary. 
3. It can be tempting to force our children to brave when they are afraid. Take baby steps to help them overcome their fear. If they are afraid of a dog, try asking your child if they would like to wave at the dog or pet the dog while you hold them. 

Childhood fears can be tricky to navigate. Just remember that you are your child's safe place. They need to be able to lean on you when they are afraid. 

It's More than Play

Do you have a climber? Or a kiddo who likes to hang upside down? Does your child like to line up their toys? Or throw things? For parents, these repeated patterns of play may leave you wondering why your child likes to play this way. And unfortunately, sometimes these patterns of play can be misinterpreted as mischief or naughtiness. 

So let's take a look at what these patterns of play really are. These are called schemas. Schemas are basically urges that kids have that show up in their play. These urges are natural, necessary and not something kids can control. Here's the thing about these urges, kids are actually building their brain through these repeated behaviors. Understanding these schemas can help parents understand their child's behavior and support their development. It can also help parent redirect them when necessary. 

Orientation

Kids who enjoy hanging upside down or climbing are building their orientation schema. This kind of play helps kids understand things from different points of view. Kids have to have the opportunity to view things from different heights and be upside down to build this understanding of orientation. Parents can give their child safe opportunities to climb and hang. Go to the playground. Allow your child to climb trees. Children will also enjoy using binoculars, telescopes or magnify glass. Kids may also enjoy exploring reflections using unbreakable hand held mirrors. The challenge of this schema is safety. Use redirection like, "you can't climb on this, but you can climb on this" or "this isn't a safe place to climb, we will go outside after lunch and you can climb."

Positioning

In our early childhood classrooms, we often see kids who like to line up toys. It might be cars or animals or even blocks. Some of us still carry this schema with us into adulthood. Some of us might organize our spice rack alphabetically or have our pencils lined up on our desk. Parents can help children build their understanding of positioning by providing groupings of similar toys (i.e., cars or animals) that their child can line up. Ask you child questions about how they are positioning their toys. The hard part of this schema is child can become very upset when their order is disrupted by someone. As parents we need to help them learn to manage their feelings when this happens. 

Connection 

Kids who are building their connection schema enjoy playing with toys like Legos or putting beads on a string or connecting train tracks together. Some other activities to offer your child are puzzles, opportunity to practice with buttons, zippers and snaps, small pieces of paper to tape together, Part of connection is also disconnection. Kids working on this schema have the urge to knock over towers even if they didn't build the tower. 

Trajectory

This was definitely my son's schema. When he first became mobile, he didn't crawl. He sat on his bottom and swung his legs from side to side to scoot himself across the floor. Our joke was that he didn't crawl because he wouldn't have been able to hold a ball in each hand. He would throw one of the balls and then scoot after the ball. Kids working on this schema enjoy throwing things, kicking balls and dropping things. Have various items, like scarves, balls, bean bags or balloons, for your child to explore. Your child may also enjoy chasing bubbles, splatter painting or bowling. Now is a good time to put away breakable items and make sure you have plenty of soft balls available. 

Rotation

Kids who have the urge to spin around or watch wheels on toy cars/trains move enjoy rotation. Involve your child in the kitchen by letting them stir ingredients, whisk eggs, and use a salad spinner to dry vegetables. Kids will also enjoy playing on a merry go round, spinning on chairs and drawing circles. Parents will want to child proof items that have knobs. These kids also like to remove lids from containers so make sure that dangerous items are out of reach. 

Transforming 

This urge is all about mixing things together. Your child may like to mix their food together. Kids will also enjoy mixing paints and getting things wet and letting them dry. Make sensory bottles so your child can watch items mix together. Have your child help you in the kitchen by mixing together ingredients for items like cookies or muffins. The obvious challenge to this schema is the mess. Parents can give their child small amounts of paints to mix on a plate or bowl. 

Transporting 

Does your child like to move things from place to place? If so, they are working on the transporting schema. Kids will enjoy gathering items to put into baskets and moving toys like boats in the bathtub. Now is a great time to introduce some easy chores like clearing unbreakable dishes from the table or helping load clothes into the washer and dryer. These kids will enjoy being sent on errands to put things away or bring you things. Have lots of containers your child can use to move items around. Parents may find it helpful to have fewer toys available to help minimize mess. 

Enclosure & Enveloping

If your child enjoys building forts, hiding, putting toys in boxes or hiding them in containers or under things like sand, then they are working on enclosure skills. Parents can support these skills by playing hide and seek, giving your child different size boxes to play with, and playing in the sand with shovels. Keep essential items, like keys, out of reach your child since they like to hide things. 

Here are a few take aways for parents to remember. Children can become hyper focused on a particular schema leading them repeatedly play the same way. This can become frustrating and tiring for parents. The key thing to remember is your child is building their brain. They are growing their understanding of the world by exploring again and again. Find ways to engage your child in a particular schema while finding ways to minimize frustration for you! And most importantly enjoy watching and playing with your child!

Burnout is Real

I am going to be really honest here. I am stressed. The past month and half at my house has been crazy busy. My kids have returned to school which means adjusting to a new schedule and the return of homework. The start of school also means I am back at work. My husband, who travels for work, has been gone a lot. The fall sports schedule is underway. All this combines to lead to one stressed and overwhelmed mama. 

The thing is I know I am not alone. Parents of kids of all ages feel stressed and overwhelmed. They also don't feel supported. Motherly found in their 2019 State of Motherhood Survey that "51% of moms feel discouraged when it comes to managing the stress of work and motherhood. About one-third of moms said that their mental and physical health is suffering. And 85% of moms said that our society does not do a good job of supporting mothers." 

All I can think is...Eighty-five percent! There is something wrong when 85% of mothers don't feel supported by our society. And I know it is isn't just moms. Dads feel overwhelmed and stressed too. 

So what can we do about this? First, we as parents need to reach out for support. One great place to find this for parents of young children is Early Childhood Family Education (ECFE). ECFE is a parent education program but just as important is the support and connection that we help facilitate between parents. Come join us for a class!

Let's also strive to create a supportive community to surround all parents. When you see a parent of a toddler in the throws of a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store aisle, give that parent a smile. Let them know you have been there. Tell them they've got this. Do you know a parent of a new baby? Maybe make an double batch of dinner and bring the extra over to share. Volunteer to come over and watch your friend's kid so they can take an uninterrupted nap.

Also, let's get real on social media. We need to stop comparing our lives and/or kids to what other people are posting. Recognize that the perfect family picture that someone posts probably took at least a dozen not so perfect attempts. More than like at least one kid cried and one parent yelled! Maybe we can take it a step further. Maybe we could post one or two pictures or stories where we show what real life is like!

And if you are like me, feeling stressed and overwhelmed by trying to balance all of it, don't be afraid to ask for help. I know this is hard but we have to be willing to be vulnerable. We have to be willing to say we aren't perfect and we don't have it all together. If we take this step, and maybe even ask for help, other parents maybe inspired to do the same. 

The Last First Day

The first day of school is here! Maybe you sent your kiddo off to their first day of kindergarten this week. Some of you may be gearing up for the first day of preschool or ECFE next week. Either way, the first day of school often comes with mixed emotions for kids and parents. Many of you may be wondering how your baby can possibly be going into preschool, kindergarten or maybe the last year of elementary school. Maybe, just maybe, there are a few of you out there who are in the same boat as me. This week I sent my oldest baby off to her last first day of school. That's right, somehow she is already a Senior in high school and I am left wondering where the time has gone.

I have been spending a lot of time thinking about where the time has gone. And I keep returning to the old adage, "the days are long but the years are short." I know, I know. You've heard this before but when you are in the trenches with your baby or toddler or preschooler you might feel like this stage will never end. But I am here to tell you it will. And more importantly you will miss things from each stage.

Looking back to when my daughter was a 10 month old baby who still woke up 3 times a night and would only go back to sleep if I nursed her, I can remember thinking that I would never sleep through the night again. Eventually, she stopped needing to nurse and learned to fall back to sleep on her own. And even though I was so grateful for the uninterrupted sleep, I missed those quiet moments in the middle of the night when I would snuggle her close in the rocking chair. There was nothing quite as wonderful as those moments when she would fall asleep, sigh and smile contentedly. And even though I was exhausted, I would often sit for just a few extra minutes watching my baby sleep.

Or when she was a preschooler and no one and I mean no one but me understood her when she talked. She happened to have a pretty severe speech articulation delay. We wanted nothing more than for her to be able to speak clearly. After a few months of speech therapy, the missing sounds started to develop and suddenly more and more people could understand her. This was great for her and us. And yet, I missed hearing her say "Taby" or thank you in her language.

I even miss things from the terrible year when she was twelve. Ugh! Twelve was rough. I wasn't sure I was going to survive twelve but I did and she did too. Twelve was the year where she was still a little girl in a lot of ways but she was also fighting to become more independent, more grown up. I miss those moments when she showed her "little girl" like when she still wanted to be read to or tucked into bed or have her dad sing her her song.

This week I hugged my girl and sent her off to the first of many lasts that will happen this year. I celebrated the start of this new milestone and all the exciting things that are yet to come. I also let myself cry, just a little because I know I will miss so many things when she is off to college next year.

So just remember, "the days are long but the years are short." Know that each new stage will bring with it new challenges and things to celebrate but one thing will hold true. You will miss things, things you never thought you would miss, from each stage. So pause and enjoy the stage you are in. Don't wish it away, even the hard parts.

School's Out For Summer

It is hard to believe that the end of the school year is upon us. The school year brought with it a lot of fun and learning for your kids, families and our staff. Now that school is out, many parents are left wondering what they are going to do to keep their kiddos busy, entertained and learning through the summer. Never fear, we are here to share some great resources and ideas with you!

First, let's start with some summer safety tips.

• https://www.cdc.gov/family/kids/summer/index.htm
• http://kidshealth.org/en/parents/summerspotlight/
• http://www.seattlechildrens.org/safety-wellness/safety/summer-safety-tips

At the end of each school year, the parents in my classes help to create a summer fun list. Below you will find several fun places to visit and adventures to go on with your children.

Parks

• Teddy Bear Park-Stillwater
• Pioneer Park-Stillwater
• Chutes & Ladders-Hyland Park Reserve, Bloomington
• Carver Lake Park
• Woodbridge Park-Cottage Grove
• Woodbury Parks Events (Puppet Wagon, Performances, etc)
• https://www.woodburymn.gov/departments/recreation/special_events.php

Water Fun

• Carver Lake Beach
• Splash Pads
• Healtheast Sport Center
• Highland Park in Cottage Grove
• Como Pool
• Waterworks-Battle Creek Park, St. Paul
• Rosebrook Park & Wading Pool-2590 Fry St, Roseville
• Lake Elmo Park Reserve

Out and About

• North St. Paul's Friday Night History Cruzer Car Show
• Little Log House Antique Power Show-Hastings
• Como Zoo
• Minnesota Zoo
• Hemker Zoo
• Berry Picking at Afton Apple Orchard, Pinetree Orchard Berry Farm
• Nature Centers
• Tamarack Nature Center-5287 Otter Lake Rd, White Berry Township
• Maplewood Nature Center-2659 E 7th St., Maplewood
• Carpenter Nature Center-12805 St. Croix Trail S, Hastings
• Dodge Nature Center-365 Marie Ave W, West St. Paul
• Oakdale Discovery Center-4444 Hadley Ave N, Oakdale
• Free Forest School
• Skoolie Bus
• Kids Bowl Free

ECFE/SR Park Playdates

Come join other ECFE/SR families for play time. There are two opportunities each week during the month of June to play and keep connected. 

• Mondays, June 3rd, 10th, 17th & 24th 
• 9:30-11 am at Colby Lake Park in Woodbury, off Valley Creek Rd (behind Valley Crossing School)
• Wednesdays, June 5th, 12th, 19th & 26th
• 9:30-11 am at Woodbridge Park, 9000 90th St. S, Cottage Grove

Have a fun and safe summer. We can't wait to see you again in the fall for ECFE and preschool classes.