A Generous Spirit

I was recently on my Facebook page and saw a post about a young girl who started her own toy drive to donate new toys to the local children's hospital. As I read through the post, I was left wondering why some children just seem to be naturally generous. They see a need and they are called to do something to meet that need. Is it something they are born with? Do their parents have some sort of magic trick? 

Sometimes when we hear stories like this we are left wondering what we are doing wrong. Why our children aren't displaying generosity in big ways. All kids can be generous and their small acts of generosity, whether it be sharing a toy or helping you shovel the freshly fallen snow are important and can be encouraged. How do we raise children who are generous in both small and big ways?

1. Generosity starts with empathy. Empathy is not an inborn trait. Children are hardwired to care but need to be taught empathy. The best way for children to learn empathy is to be shown empathy. Be the port in your child's storm. In other words, when they are experiencing big emotions, stay calm and respond in a loving way by recognizing and naming their emotions. Help them regulate their emotions by offering comfort and care before addressing their behavior. 
2. Generosity is developmental. All areas of development develop on a continuum. No two children will develop generosity in the same way and timing. 
3. Sharing is a great way for young children to show generosity. That being said sharing can be hard for young children. Make sure you have age appropriate expectations. Children develop sharing and turn taking skills between 3.5 and 4. Younger children can also share but need more support and guidance. Also avoid forcing your child to share. Instead encourage children to share by pointing out how happy their friend is when they share their toy with their friend. Making other people happy makes us happy! 
4. There are several common misconceptions about generosity. Generosity is often viewed as something we do for those with less than us. It is often only associated with giving money or things. There is also a common belief that generosity is only beneficial to the person receiving the generosity. But we know there is so much more to generosity!
5. There are three ways to be generous. You can share your time, talents and treasures. Help your child practice being generous in all these areas. You might encourage them to play a game that someone else wants to do to share their time. You and your child could make cookies or draw pictures to give to a neighbor or friend to share their talents. Sharing their treasures might include donating part of their allowance or toys that they know longer play with to others. 
6. There are many benefits to generosity. Kids who are generous are more likely to do well in school and less likely to abuse drugs/alcohol. Generosity also helps develop leadership skills, such as, learning to respect others, developing patience, and having a better understanding of what makes a good citizen. 
7. Finally, the best way for children to learn how to be generous is to see their parents being generous. Model generosity for your children by sharing your time, talents and treasures with them and with others!

A great way to start practicing generosity with your children is with the 10 Days of Giving Campaign. ECFE and Preschool with be participating in district-wide 10 Days of Giving Campaign to collect toiletry items for the Holiday Train starting December 1st-10th. Participating is easy. Have your child pick out some shampoo, soap, toothbrushes or other toiletry items. Items can be dropped off for donation at our Central Park and District Program offices. Thanks for helping and Happy Giving!